Pleasure vs. Value: Opting for Sustainable Success Without Compromising Your Health.
Oct 28, 2023Nowadays, an increasing number of ambitious individuals are in poor physical condition. The road to success demands hard work, putting in long hours, and spending a lot of time seated in an office.
It's not uncommon for driven individuals to sideline their health and well-being in the pursuit of their ambitions. However, what surprises many is how often they unconsciously use 'I don't like it' as an excuse. In a business context, they know better than anyone that work, even the unenjoyable kind, must be done to achieve success. Yet, when it comes to actively working on their health and well-being, I often see people letting the factor of enjoyment stand in their way.
Here are some typical statements I often hear:
"I don’t exercise because I don’t enjoy it."
"If I don’t enjoy a workout, I can’t stick with it."
“I don’t like going to the gym.”
Perhaps you see yourself or others in these statements. But have you ever paused to consider what such statements truly imply and the consequences they might hold?
What's actually being said is: "I don’t take care of my body because I don’t 'enjoy' taking care of it."
If this resonates with you, reflect on the impact of this mindset on your health. What if a surgeon were to think in a similar way?
Imagine being in a life-threatening accident, being taken to the operation room, and the surgeon says, "Oh no, I won’t perform this surgery. I don’t find the procedure enjoyable."
This is precisely what's happening when you decide to avoid something because you don’t find it enjoyable. It's crucial to do, but it isn’t enjoyable, so you don’t do it. Repeat this often enough, across various domains, and sooner or later, you’re bound to run into serious problems.
What if you weren't reliant on 'finding things enjoyable'?
That instead of basing actions on whether you enjoy them, you based them on their value.
This shift in perspective can bring substantial value to your health and well-being and even further your ambitions.
Let's face it, isn't doing something because it's valuable more important than whether you enjoy it?
The most valuable things in life are often not enjoyable
If 'pleasure' where the primary driver of a good life, wouldn’t we all live in a massive amusement park?
The fact that we don’t speaks volumes.
Now, here’s an unpopular opinion. Skip this if you're easily offended. I’m about to be brutally honest:
Who mainly focuses on doing fun things?
Little children.
An adult refusing to do something because it's not fun is, in all honesty, acting like a child. I'm not saying this behavior is inherently good or bad. What I am saying is that this behavior can make your life considerably uncomfortable in the long run.
If you want to prevent 'pleasure' from making your life 'tedious' in the long term, keep reading. I will equip you with a potent distinction and an effective strategy to help make choices that add absolute value to your life, whether it’s about health or any other domain.
What you will learn:
- Apply distinction: Pleasure vs. Valuable
- Strategy for achieving valuable goals
A brief dive-in
The health, fitness, and overall well-being of the majority are rapidly declining. This is no different for ambitious individuals and entrepreneurs. Increasingly, people are overweight, out of shape, plagued by physical/mental issues, have one or more chronic conditions, and are fundamentally unhealthy.
I assist people in losing weight, getting fit, and building a robust body.
But can I genuinely help someone? Strictly speaking, no. People can only help themselves.
I can only open someone’s eyes and offer the chance to make different choices, leading to a desired outcome.
In countless coaching sessions I've held, it's striking how often people talk about avoiding something because they don’t find it fun. Here are a few examples:
"I don’t find exercising fun."
"I don’t enjoy cooking."
"I don’t like saying 'no' (to my children)."
"I don’t enjoy confronting people about their behavior."
All these equate to: I don’t want to feel uncomfortable.
If you consistently avoid discomfort, it bears serious repercussions.
Not exercising leads to poor fitness. Disliking cooking tempts unhealthy choices. Refusing to say 'no' robs you of control over your life. Not confronting people's behavior allows them to walk over you.
Consistently avoiding discomfort can wreak havoc on your life, especially in the long run.
It is a leading cause of:
- Burnout
- Depression
- Physical ailments
- Overweight and obesity
- Low energy
- Lifestyle diseases
- Relationship issues
- Headaches and migraines
- And more...
Experiencing discomfort is simply a must for a successful life with good health. Challenges, setbacks, and obstacles are inherent to life. If you keep avoiding them for fleeting pleasure or comfort, it will impact the quality of your life. Regarding health, neglecting discomfort has the potential to severely harm your well-being.
Fun versus Valuable
As humans, we constantly tend to do two things:
- Pursue good feelings.
- Avoid bad feelings.
Fun activities make us feel good, and when we're feeling down, something fun can help dispel that negative feeling. That's why we're often so focused on doing 'fun' things.
The rise of social media has only amplified this. It suggests that everyone is always having fun, doing fun things, and living a great life.
If you're not experiencing that yourself at that moment, it can evoke a negative feeling. Like the feeling of not being good enough, not having enough, or not doing enough fun things.
Even though we know deep down that people on social media mainly share their best moments, this constant reflection can enhance the desire for 'fun.'
The problem is that this preference for 'fun' often comes at the expense of doing valuable things. It's precisely these valuable activities that people often avoid or postpone. But what is the cost of this?
Here are two examples to illustrate the consequences of this behavior:
Overweight
Take Marcel. He has been struggling with overweight for years. He enjoys going out, gourmet food, craft beers, and playing video games late into the night. In the short term, this provides pleasure, but these habits are at the core of his weight problem. For Marcel, it would be more valuable to make healthy food choices, drink less, exercise regularly, and go to bed early. If he looked at his life from this perspective, he wouldn't have a weight problem.
Poor Condition
Juliet runs her own business and finds it stressful. After a long day of work, she likes to watch TV shows, drink wine, and rest. On weekends, she's often tired and is inactive to 'recharge.' However, this lifestyle has led to poor physical condition. Juliet could make more valuable choices, such as doing yoga to relax instead of drinking wine, walking instead of watching TV, or exercising. To recognize what's valuable, she needs to honestly look at her situation and accept that doing valuable things often feels uncomfortable.
The distinction between fun and valuable is life-changing
Marcel and Juliet both make choices that give them a good feeling in the short term. Although this may be pleasant in the moment, they both struggle with common health problems: overweight and poor physical condition.
If they continue this behavior, it can cause serious health problems in the long term. Both overweight and poor condition are precursors to countless chronic diseases.
People often know they're on the wrong track, but they consistently avoid change, simply to avoid feeling uncomfortable. Change usually comes across as tricky, unpleasant, annoying, difficult, or heavy. For many people, this is reason enough to resist change. To avoid feeling guilty or bad about themselves, people come up with reasons and excuses not to take action.
People often can't imagine what it's like on the other side. How it feels when their problem is solved. The fear of the discomfort of the work outweighs long-term desires.
Until the point that someone realizes something really needs to change. That someone sees the value of what achieving the goal brings.
If you can look at the actions in your life from the perspective of 'whether something is valuable', both in the short and long term, then a lot will change.
If you stop choosing based on pleasure, convenience, and comfort, but choose based on importance, priority, and value, that is what changes a life.
To help you look and choose based on value, I have an effective strategy for you.
Strategy: Choose Value
Grab a pen and paper or your notes on your computer or laptop.
Create a table with four boxes.
Write the following above the boxes:
- Fun and worthless
- Fun and valuable
- Valuable and not fun
- Worthless and not fun
Before you do anything with the table, answer the following two questions:
- What do you want to achieve that you haven't achieved yet?
- What do you want to solve that you haven't done yet?
There's a chance you've never answered these kinds of questions before. Take your time and look at this honestly and sincerely. Answer the questions.
Now fill in the boxes of the table. Write down a minimum of 3 to a maximum of 5 things that you do or should do in the corresponding boxes.
You now have the following:
- 3-5 things you do that are fun, but worthless.
- 3-5 things you do that are fun and valuable.
- 3-5 things you do or should do that are valuable but not fun.
- 3-5 things you do or should do that are worthless and not fun.
Look honestly and sincerely at what you have written.
Cross out all the things that are worthless, but you still do, that you can stop now.
Now create a priority list of all the valuable things, numbered from 1 (high urgency) to 10 (lowest urgency).
Do yourself a favor now. Make the top three your highest priority goals and start working on them today.
Work purposefully on realizing your goals for the next 3-6 months and let me know what it has done for you. I am very curious.
"Change is hard at first, messy in the middle, and gorgeous at the end."
- Robin Sharma